Making Sense of Middle School
Dr. Michele Borba has a conversation with Judith Warner about tweens and her latest book, And Then They Stopped Talking to Me
7 Common Back to School Hassles and Simple Parenting Solutions
Though back to school should be exciting, parents often describe frantic mornings, hectic evenings, and plain bad memories. Homework wars…lost library books…last-minute assignments…missed buses…sleepy heads…forgotten lunches…missed breakfasts…late starts are just a few of the common parenting concerns. The result: stressed parents...and stressed kids. But it doesn’t have to—nor should it--be that way. There are practical solutions to the most common back-to-school, and hot button parenting...
7 Surprising Solutions That Boost Kids’ School Success
Simple, proven solutions to enhance children's learning that every parent should have in their back to school toolbox. Academic success impacts our children for the rest of their life: it influences their self-esteem, college selections, job attainment, financial success, and even their choice of spouses. It's no wonder we go to great lengths to give our kids an academic edge. But despite our good intentions we often overlook a few simple strategies that research has proven to impact...
What It Takes To End School Violence and Bullying
What does it take to really end school violence and bullying? Let's get real: Ultimately, what works to reduce bullying is not one time assemblies or posters but consistently relying on a few key evidence-based bullying prevention policies, principles, and practices tailored to your classroom or school. Let's stop reacting and using quick-fix, band-aid approaches. Our kids deserve safe schools and caring educators using research based strategies can stop youth violence. Bullying remains a...
How to Raise a Strong, Confident Girl
Want to raise a strong, confident girl? The secret is now in print by Katie Hurley. No More Mean Girls and is the must read for every parent and educator. It's our best hope to turn #METOO into #NotMyDaughter! Thank you, Katie! Here's to #GIRLPOWER!! How do we raise a strong, confident girl? “I don’t want to go to school,” Jenna told me. “All the girls hate me, so I’ll just sit by myself again while they laugh at me. I can’t take it anymore!” Peer cruelty...
12 Ways to Boost Kids’ Empathy During the Holidays and Build Fun Memories
How to Tone Down $$$, Tune Up Family Memories and Nurture Children's Empathy During the Holidays REALITY CHECK: Total spending is projected to be between $678 billion and $682 billion, up from $655.8 billion last year. Nationally, holiday spending has increased annually since 2009 and has experienced a steady stair-step increase ever since. But there's a hidden danger for our children. Research shows that when kids think about "things and not people," their empathy quotients lower. Tired...
Teaching Kids Money Smarts During the Holidays
Parenting advice to help kids learn money management during the holidays to have a brighter future REALITY CHECK: A recent survey found that fewer than half of parents surveyed said they teach their 11 to 14-year-olds how to keep track of their expenses or set a budget. A recent report from the Organisation for Economic Co-Operation and Development (OECD) suggests that too many American teens lack some of the basic financial skills required to survive and thrive in the working world. Of the 15...
The Not-Always Obvious Benefits of Saying NO to Children
Dr. Susan Newman’s New Book Explains Why You Should Say No to Your Children…and How to Do It. A must read for the pushover tendency in all of us. You do your children a major disservice by regularly giving in to their wants, wishes, and demands. Yet, so many parents are uncomfortable saying no to their children. Not easy being the “tough guy.” It’s natural to feel guilty when you think you’re depriving your child of something he has his heart set on. But, should you? The inability to refuse a...
8 Ways Shaming Is Toxic to Kids and Moms
"You let your child sleep with you!!!?” “Why aren’t you breast-feeding??” “You’re ruining your kids Ivy-League chances if you don’t enroll him in that school!!!” “That’s a lame way to discipline!” Shaming is happening on a wide-scale level at play dates, the check-out line at the grocery store, school parking lots, or on Facebook. Every day, moms are shamed for their parenting styles-whether it’s slow parenting, free-range, helicoptering, tiger mummying or whatever. And it's all too...
21 Ways to Build Caring Student Relationships
Empathy Habit 1. EMOTIONAL LITERACY Empathy Habit 6. DEVELOPING & EXERCISING COMPASSION From UnSelfie: Why Empathetic Kids Succeed in Our All-About-Me World Reality Check: Improving students' relationships with teachers has important, positive and long-lasting implications for both students' academic, social and moral development, and is often the key over-looked curriculum. The crucial element about any classroom is the strength of the relationship between the students...
How to Praise To Boost Kids’ Character
If you’re like most parents, you probably shower your kids with praise. After all, isn’t our encouragement the secret sauce to boosting our kids’ success and happiness? What could be more affirming than telling your child, “Good job!” “I’m proud of you” or “You are smart!” Well, as it turns out, these type of encouraging messages may not be so helpful as we think. According to research, wrongly worded praise can reduce children’s desires to take on challenges, lower achievement, reduce...
4 Secrets to Raising a Compassionate Child
Empathy is the trait that helps make the world a kinder and gentler place, and empathy can be developed and improved. Wherever your children fit on the "caring about others" scale, there is always room for improvement. But what are proven ways parents can increase their children's capacity to be kind and care? I've sought that answer for over a decade and interviewed dozens of leading experts to find it. Ironically, it was at the site of unimaginable horrors, the Auschwitz concentration camp,...
5 Creative Ways Educators Teach Empathy
Vanuatu, Tibet, Afghanistan, Denmark, and Armenia: How educators are activating students' empathy and making a difference! I'm convinced that empathy is the glue that holds a civilized society together, is the best antidote to stop bullying, aggression and intolerance, and empathy is slowing unraveling. I set out on a decade-long journey to find the best ways to cultivate empathy. I literally flew the world, spoke with countless of researchers, conducted focus groups with hundreds of children,...
19 Signs Your Child Is Bullied and What to Do
How do you know if your child is bullied? 19 warning signs of bullying, the questions a parent must ask to find out and what to do. You've read the news and you've seen stories about bullying tragedies. Forty-nine states have passed anti-bullying policies - law makers, educators, counselors, law enforcement, pediatricians and parents alike are concerned. If your child is bullied it means that a peer or peers are intentionally causing her or him pain. Peer abuse! Just the thought can send...
Helping Kids Be Goal-Setters
Parenting tips that teach kids to set resolutions and make them stick so they succeed! Do you know that goal-setting is one of the most highly correlated traits of peak performers and successful individuals? But goal-setting isn’t just for grown-ups. Studies show that goal-setting can help kids gain the sense of discipline and that internal drive it takes to stay motivated to complete the tasks they've set for themselves. And once they've learned how to set their own goal it shows in their...
9 Creative Ways for Kids to Write Thank Yous and Why They Should
REALITY CHECK: Did you know that writing a "thank you" note is a simple, proven way to boost your child's gratitude? That's what researchers from the University of California at Davis and Southern Methodist University found. But that's not all: researchers also discovered that being thankful might be the key to raising your child's happiness and well-being. For the past ten years two professors, Robert Emmons and Michael McCollugh, have examined date of several hundred people who were...
Teaching Kids to Be Grateful, Even If Disappointed
REALITY CHECK: Have you taught your child an often overlooked and critical holiday skill for kids of how to show gratitude and appreciation even when you're disappointed with what you've received?" The skill is one that can be practiced and is a simple but crucial habit that helps cultivate children's empathy so they think about others, not themselves. If you haven't checked that calendar, here's a word to the wise: in the next few days your child is going to be receiving a gift from someone....
Character Education: 5 Steps to Teach A Character Virtue
REALITY CHECK: Sixty percent of adults believe that young people’s failure to learn moral values is a serious national problem. Over the past two decades, there’s been a decline in children’s moral character, and 72 percent of Americans say moral values are “getting worse” a large majority of college students say “cheating is necessary to get ahead,” and 70 percent admit to cheating. Not surprisingly, cheating is also on an upswing, and the most typical kind of moral reasoning among recent...
6 Reasons to Halt the Kid “Trophy Epidemic”
Just pretend: The sports season just ended and you and the other parents are bursting with pride watching each child receive a participation trophy with their teammates. Of course, we hate to see our children disappointed, so when we notice every kid holding a golden statue, we utter a collective parent sigh: “Oh, good, they all feel special!” Phew! But do our good intentions really help our kids? Not if we really want to nurture our children's character and base our parenting on solid...
Depression in Young Children
New study finds children as young as 2 and 3 can be depressed Producers from the TV show, THE DOCTORS, asked me to share the signs of early depression and what parents should do if they suspect their child is depressed. Here is my report. Preschoolers? Depressed? Impossible!! Well, don’t be too sure. A recent study, funded by the National Institute of Mental Health, shows otherwise. The research found that depression in young children is real and can be identified as young as two years of...
Rise of Youth Narcissism and the Social Networking Connection
Reality Check: Is social networking connected with the rise of teen narcissism? I've written a number of articles about Teen Arrogance but now I want to dig deeper into troubling research reports that show a rise in teen narcissism and decrease in empathy. Here are the facts that every parent and educator must know. Remember, the key is not just what your teen is plugging into, but plugging out of. If it's family, social connections and learning the seeds of morality (empathy!) then it's...